Weekend Madness

Look! I got a Two-fer!

   This weekend has been jam packed full of home improving fun! Tons of projects getting crossed off our list, Hallelujah! Today we ran down to Lowe's (my favorite store) and when we got out of the car, guns blazing, ready to tackle our giant list of things we needed.... We found two very cute sleeping daughters. I super love them. I thought I was going to explode with mommy love in that moment. If you look closely you can see Oli's hood over one eye, she is a tiny gangster. And what you can't see is Ava covered from Head to Pink booted toe in graham cracker crumbs. And let me just tell ya, I'm not exaggerating here people... She seriously dusted the top of her head with crumbs as if it were pixie dust and she was hoping to fly! I love that little weirdy. I told Daniel it was a two-fer, because both of them fell asleep at the same time (which never happens!). 

   It has been such an awesome weekend, and one of the best parts was at Church this morning. I love my Church, everything about it. And this morning as Daniel and I were leading worship I had this awesome God moment. You know, the kind where you break out into an ugly cry in front of your entire congregation trying to explain something God is showing you? Oh... You have no idea what I mean? Let me explain. While we were singing "Came to my Rescue" I had an image in my mind of a swimmer way out in the ocean who all of a sudden is terrified they may drown. The swimmer then looks on shore to see the life guard there, watching, ready at any moment to rescue. It seems obvious, doesn't it? But God blew me away. He wants to rescue me. When I am at my weakest and feel like I can't keep going, I can throw my hands up and He will run to me. And save me. Every time. Why? Because I am so awesome? Nope. It's because He desires relationship with me. And even in my long seasons of not pursuing relationship with Him, He waits for me. Ready, at any moment to rescue me and woo me back into relationship with Him. Insane. Seriously, blows my mind. So this morning, while on stage, I explain this to the congregation and i bust out my ugliest cry. But hey, the message I was trying to get across was more important then my composure, right? Definitely. So there ya have it. Just let that sink in. God is more then good. So incredible. 

Grace & Peace 

Lookin' Good...

Last night Daniel and I had the privilege to help our sister in law lead worship at a Prophetic Prayer Meeting. I was extremely nervous, because I haven't sang in public since before I had Ava. It has been over 4 months and I was worried I "lost it". As the set began the Prophetic Speaker was sitting right in front of me. I was so worried about her realizing I was nervous and not focused on worship. So I began to put on a really good worship "show". Making deep thinking faces, really stretching out my arms... And then it hit me. She is Prophetic, she can see right through me. I felt so dumb...
Once we were home, I began thinking about it more. I was putting on a Spiritual show for a Prophetic woman. It just sounded funny in my head. But then it hit me. God is the ultimate Prophet, the All Knowing Creator, and yet we put on Spiritual shows for him all the time. Why do we think that we are able to pull the hypothetical wool over God's eyes? He can tell when we don't mean what we say or when we are pretending to worship. Looking back on it, I realized I do that more often then I thought I had. On Sunday mornings during worship I am actually thinking about how dirty my house is or how mad I was at someone. Not at how great my God is. Now don't get me wrong, there are definitely times when we don't feel like worshiping but we have to push into God any way. That's not what I'm talking about. I mean when you are so distracted with other stuff you just pretend.
Everyday I need to wake up and think Authentically. Tell God how I really feel. If I am struggling, then let it show. I know it would sure relieve a lot of stress in my life. Having to pretend all the time is exhausting, so I am going to live Authentically with my God.