Sunday, May 12, 2013

I Just Want To Be With You

Mothers Day.
As a child, it was a day when Dad was in charge. He planned the day's events, bought the cards for us to sign, and directed us in our tasks to show my Mom how wonderful she was. It is a fond memory. Looking back on those days makes my heart smile. Knowing what I do now, I understand my Dad's deep desire to show his wife how marvelous she was. How hard she worked. How unconditionally she loved. And for a kid, we just thought it was a day to give our mom and extra hug and eat BBQ for dinner. Do I think I undervalued my mom on Mothers Day as a child? Yes. Do I think it mattered to her? No. Because of one thing. There was always one thing she wanted. The same every year, without fail. The days leading up to Mothers Day when we would ask my Mom what she wanted she would respond in a quiet and sweet voice, "I just want to be with you." As a kid, that was the best answer ever. I always feared she would ask for something HUGE. Like cleaning my room. (My room was referred to as the Black Hole. Once something went in there, it was rarely seen again.) Now, being a Mom to three little humans I understand her simple request.
   I was reminiscing this morning about my first Mothers Day. May 10th, 2009. One week before my due date with Ava. I spent the day with Daniel preparing for the arrival of our precious girl. Fast forward four years and I now have 3 children who call me Mom. Three little loves that I nurtured in my belly and now they are here. Living, breathing, tiny humans. When I think about Mothers Day and what I want to do, I think about wanting to spend time with my children. It is because of them that I get to be celebrated on this day. It is because of them that I get to experience things like laughing so hard someone shoots milk out of their nose. It is because of them that I get to experience the joy of giving birth. It is because of them that I get to experience the wonderment of learning something new. It is because of them that I get to Mother.

   So here I am years later asking for the same thing my Mom always did. I am sure that in years to come that will still be my answer. And when my children have grown and gone their own ways and I think back on my past I will remember moments like these, when all I wanted was to spend time together. To let life slow down for a while and enjoy my family. And no matter how old they get or where their lives take them, when they ask me what I want for Mothers Day I will quietly and sweetly say, "I just want to be with you."

Grace & Peace


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Thanks for checking out my blog. The writings found on these pages are just sincere thoughts, questions, and feelings I have about life, God, and banana slugs.