I had a dream last night that shook me so hard core. I wont go into details, because just writing it in my journal took 5 pages. It was a long one. But the thing I am realizing from said dream is that even though I was saying I wanted to hear what God had for me and I was constantly crying out to Him to speak, I never postured myself in a way to hear. He had to use my subconscious dream to speak to me. It wasn't the exact answer I wanted, but it was Him telling me something huge that I need to learn. I feel so silly. Looking back on the past few weeks most of my day was spent whining about how i didn't think God was going to ever answer me. But it's because my thoughts and actions were displaying a different set of attitudes. Not one of patiently seeking. But of irritatingly nagging. Sorry about that one God.
I woke up at the end of my dream to Ava crying. And when I realized what was going on I couldn't figure out if my dream had truly happened or not. I was tired and sweaty, as if i was active... But i was laying in my bed. I looked at Daniel and started telling him my dream. He was a good husband, he stayed awake even though he was so exhausted. I guess the point of this blog is more for me. I am realizing that most of the time I ask God for something and i don't posture myself in the right way. It isn't the same way every time, but making it a priority to be ready to hear or receive makes all the difference.
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